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Sunday, November 01, 2009


"At upbeat, open-mike “celebrations of life,” former coaches, neighbors and relatives amuse us with stories and naïvely declare that the dead, who are usually nowhere to be seen and have nowhere to go, will nevertheless live always in our memories."

I don't understand why this is naive. We did this at my stepfather's service and I learned things about him that I'll always remember. If we hadn't done it, I'd never know how others saw him, what they felt was most important to relay to others.

And while there was laughter, I wouldn't have described those few hours as "upbeat". It was mostly heartfelt. Everyone missed his presence deeply. And still do.

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